Monday, January 3, 2011

A Question for Father

Note: After a reader raised concerns regarding the content of this poem, I feel compelled to note that the piece is meant to be a statement on my father's specific relationship with my mother and not in any way an overall indictment of women.

I admire and respect many fellow bloggers, most of them women, and hope that respect is not at all obscured by this post.

How is it as a woman?
Please tell me, is it fun?
I hope this wisdom you'll impart
Dear father, to your son

Do you ever find it odd
To go while sitting down?
Do you your face admire much
When no one is around?

Does it feel most airy there
That gap between your legs?
Where we men have an instrument
That our attention begs

And what of breasts upon your front?
Of that you surely know
When yours so shapely and so firm
Through thickest garments show

How is to be so weak
So smitten with a man
That you indulge his every whim
Obey his each command?

You're rather ugly for a dame
But it won't get you blue
For there's in sad and quick defeat
No truer dame than you

Do you shudder with delight
When Mother comes to bed?
And does she take you from the front
Or from your other end?

Do you pretend at modesty
And motion to decline
When she over your protests deigns
To have you from behind?

I love you father but I won't
Adopt what you hold dear
Your flaming girlish posture is
Too shameful for a queer

Unlike you I am a man
I stand strong as a rock
While in your dress lie folds and lace
In my pants is a cock


secret agent woman said...

Wow. I have to say, you have some very strange (and not flattering) ideas about women.

secret agent woman said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
BrightenedBoy said...

Secret Agent Woman: The poem was about my father's specific pusillanimous submission to my mother and was not meant to be a statement on women in general.

I think anyone with even the dimmest knowledge of my character or writing would agree that I entertain no prejudices toward women and in fact am appalled by such sentiments.

secret agent woman said...

re-read it, and I still just am not liking what it's saying. Your other readers may disagree, but I'm having a visceral reaction to this portrayal of women. And your explanation seems to suggest that submission is somehow a feminine trait, and that men who aren't as strong as their wives are woman-like. wish you'd re-read from that perspective.

BrightenedBoy said...

Friends, even online friends, are apt to disagree.

I can understand your perspective, but the fact of the matter is that the poem is deliberately demeaning; given my father's homophobia and exaggerated masculinity, I felt that the surest way to disparage him would be to compare him to a passive and unassertive woman.

I of course did not mean to imply that all women are passive or unassertive.

I consider it a mark of respect that you expressed your opinion to me rather than politely ignoring what you saw as objectionable material.

That kind of discourse is something I always welcome.

otherworldlyone said...

I don't find it offensive, but...well, you know.

Actually, I found it intriguing and a bit disturbing.

Harley said...

The only part of this I didn't like was the unnecessary use of the word 'queer'. The rest, after reading your explanation in the comments, I can understand and appreciate.

BrightenedBoy said...


The "queer" in the poem refers to the fact that I am gay. My father's homophobia was a great burden to me as a child, and I'm making the point that even a "queer" is more a man than him.

Thank you for giving your opinion, though. I always worry that people might feel they can't disagree with me on here.