Sunday, August 22, 2010

The Decision That Was Made for Me



I have once again stayed too long away from my blog, but it has been for a good reason that led me to a major decision.

Due to some extremely unusual circumstances, I will not be returning to Major University for the Fall semester. I tried, after conditions became apparent for what they were, to work out a way that I might commence classes in the Goldlands, but in recent days it has grown obvious that attempting to do so would be difficult at best and would likely end in my having to pull out before the end of the term anyway.

Let me assuage any fears regarding my health now: I am perfectly fine, as are all my family members. The factors behind this development aren't bad. They're just odd.

I got a taste of exactly how true that was when, after assurances of confidentiality on his part, I explained to Major University's dean of academics the justification behind my needing to either take a semester off or schedule my final exams for earlier than normal.

"Wow," he breathed, clearly at a loss of what to say. "I literally have never heard that before."

"I know," I sighed. "I know."

"And you wouldn't be able to go to your professors to ask if you could take your exams early..."

"Exactly. What would I tell them?"

"Right. Well, um...wow."

I haven't officially withdrawn from classes yet, but I'm in the process of finalizing my choice. Major University makes a distinction between those who drop out and those who take gap semesters, and I want to ensure that my intentions, of utilizing a temporary leave from college, are understood.

In the meantime my internship at Major University has ended, my bookstore job is still there, and I'm soon to start searching for a second place of employment.

I agonized over how to handle a delicate and somewhat bizarre happening and despaired that taking a semester off from school would be horribly irresponsible, but now that, after weeks of internal debate, the decision has finally been made, I feel at peace with it. I'm happy even. I find myself looking forward to Fall without college, Fall without midterms, Fall without tuition and loans.

This autumn will be the first since I was four years old that I won't be enrolled in school. That's bound to be weird.

There are certain considerations I've made regarding this, things I'm determined to do. First of all, I will find a second job and I will work a great deal. A money-making opportunity like this must be exploited. Second, I will maintain the vibrant social life that has made the last year and a half of my life such a joy. That will likely mean heading to Major University for weekend bashes, so I may not be wholly absent from campus.

Other than that, I'm taking things one day at a time and doing the best I can with that.

12 comments:

Gauss Jordan said...

I certainly know that feeling; the feeling that no matter how well you play your cards, or how well you think out a series of decisions, you can't change the outcome of a situation. It's oddly-liberating.

secret agent woman said...

I hope it goes well for you, whatever it is that's going on.

Sue said...

Well, sometimes life just screws up our plans. It sounds as if you have a plan and if you follow through with it, you should end up just fine. Good luck!

Woozie said...

A good friend of mine told me abruptly at 1 AM the other night that he likely wouldn't be returning to school either. When I asked why all he said was "scholarship shit" and then stopped responding. You people and your damn vague statements.

laura b. said...

Since it seems to be happening, might as well make the most of this time out of time (so to speak). Potentially a time of great personal growth!

Alyson said...

The vagueness is killing me, but I'm glad to know that you're healthy.

DO enjoy your fall off. And keep us posted on it. (And any travel plans, for that matter.)

Anonymously Me said...

James (can I just call you James?),
I love getting comments from you. It's like Christmas. Just so you know.

Selina Kingston said...

I don't quite understand what is going on here but it sounds as if you have come to this decision after much thought. I hope it is the right one for you. My daughter has also decided not to pursue her studies for the time being. I feel it is the wrong choice but I do respect that it is HER decision. Good luck to you

Beth Grace said...

I wish more fathers in the world understood their role in their offspring's lives. It's a shame about your dad, and for that I am sorry.
I hope everything is alright with you; I have to agree with above commenters, your vague post is a bit intriguing, but not in a good way, if that makes sense...
Anyway, take care.

Always,
Ellie Grace

Kevin Musgrove said...

Just so long as you and yours are OK. Suddenly not having an academic year calendar to work to is a bit unnerving at first.

Hope all goes well.

Harley said...

WELL.

Now I really want to know what it is. Was that the intention? To leave us all poring over the post looking for clues?

Good luck, anyway. It'll be fine!

Madame DeFarge said...

Like the others, I'm not sure what lies behind this decision, but it is a decision, so go for it, make the most of it and don't look back. Take care.