Here's the thing: I have good days and bad days. My life has always been like that. As a child, however, I was able to muster a huge degree of optimism because there were so many things I didn't understand. My comprehending many of the realities that formerly escaped me accounts for the spate of bad days I've had recently.
Still, I have to try. I can't just give up. And I'm sorry for being so damned Emo over the past couple of weeks. I guess it's all just hitting me at once, you know? I'm not going to go into the whole spiel about counting my blessings or seeing my own issues as small next to others' struggles, because that would be inauthentic; these problems are serious and this situation is awful. It sucks and there's nothing wrong with admitting that.
If I ever want to have anything, though, I have to push forward. I'm the only one who can actually make it happen.