Now that I've owned openly to that awful thing, I just want to grab some food, listen to some music, and drive to Mountain Town for a long weekend at home.
Admitting your worst weaknesses is a bit like vomiting: you want to explode with pain while you're doing it, but once it's over you're relieved.
5 comments:
Your blog is a great place to be completely honest. And as I said in my last comment, sometimes you can do it a bit in real life and people are beautiful in the ways they are willing to help :-)
Your honesty, self-awareness, and writing talents are all wonderful assets. I hope you find peace with your condition and your childhood traumas. If the blog helps you get there, it is more than worth it.
Good analogy and perhaps why I don't like being so open...I hate vomiting and will do everything I can to not.
As for your other post....As a wife of someone with abusive parents, I am so sorry. I want nothing more than for my husband to have the love he deserves, knowing he won't get it. I wish that the same could be provided for you, but fully understand that you can't make parents be who they should. -RL
I'm glad posting gave you relief.
Hang in there.
You're wonderful.
*hugs*
I just went back and read last night's post. I won't begin to say that I know how you feel. I find it insulting to say that to someone, but I will tell you this: I also have lived with something that has affected every moment of my life since I was very young. I hid it for years from everyone except my family (who didn't make fun of me, but also didn't understand it). I didn't want anyone to know that was different somehow and I have often questioned why I just couldn't be "normal" like everyone else. Somewhere around 30, I got tired of hiding it, tired of making excuses and I set myself free. I started talking openly to friends and sometimes even strangers. You know what? I didn't lose a single friend. I also learned that many more people than you know struggle with something. I am actually able to help others now. More importantly, while I still have the same issues, at least I don't have the stress of the "secret".
Do I wish I could be "normal"? Sure. But guess what, there really is no normal. You learn that the older you get. Do I wish I could be different? Yes, I do. Do I have a full and happy life "in spite of". I do and hopefully you can too.
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